Day Care

I dropped Elvis, the Official Dog of Poseur, off at day care today. The Posette is working late, and we didn't want him sitting in his crate all day, wondering why his people had abandoned him.

We pay for Elvis' day care in a block of ten appointments, which normally lasts about ten weeks. He goes in once a week, gets to play with his friends, and then come home and take a long nap on the couch. Our block ran out today, so I had to purchase a new block of ten days of day care.

Total cost? $180. $20/day with the tenth day free.

I have a hunch day care for a live human being is going to cost just slightly more than that.

Which is why I've decided I need to train Elvis to look after the LP. Elvis can fetch, lay down, and sit. He can even shake hands. He's a very good learner, and eager to please. So it shouldn't be too hard to teach him to care for a child, right?



This is Elvis. Look, this is a dog so functional that he can order a drink at a patio bar. and participate in a raffle!*

*Which, I'd like to point out, he won.


Think of the cost-saving opportunities! If Elvis can watch the LP, that reduces the need for day care, and thus, more money in my pocket. And I'm sure Child Protective Services would have no problem with this plan, and would be impressed by my Dog Whispering abilities.

There is no downside here. I mean, other than prison and likely divorce. But other than that... no downside. We start working on basic First Aid this evening.