Sorry, Poseur HQ was knocked offline due to the aftermath of the Great Earthquake of 2011. Pay no attention to the fact that I live in Texas. I'm from Maryland, and I felt the pain of my homeland.
I just couldn't focus knowing that there were chai lattes that had fallen over and will never be refilled.
Actually, I was struck by something yesterday, following the news of the earthquake. I found out about the quake from Facebook. An hour later, I had seen about two hundred thousand* jokes like the one above on Twitter. An hour after that, I saw another twelve kajillion* pleas that Earthquake jokes were all played out. It had been two hours since the event, and people were already objecting to jokes as being "old".
*All numbers are 96.3% accurate and not made up at all.
This is the world the Little Poseur is going to be born in. This blog is less than two weeks old, and you're probably already sick of it. Most of my readership has moved on to something more timely, like that pregnant puppy down the street. I mean, seriously. Puppies are really cute. I can't compete with that.
You mean this pregnancy thing is going to drag on for nine whole months? Firefly didn't last that long.*
*Damn you, FOX television executives. Damn you straight to hell.
One of the biggest events in the world that happened during my childhood was the Miracle on Ice. Perhaps you've heard of it. Well, I watched it on tape delay. Tape delay! And I had no flippin' idea who had won when I sat down in front of the TV. Because I was five. And my parents didn't like hockey. But had I been a motivated five-year-old, there still would have been no real way for me to find out about the game. The TV networks were able to keep us in the dark for half a day, and we were none the wiser.
The LP won't ever experience that. The very concept of "tape delay" will be foreign to the LP. The Little Poseur will be born into a world that moves so fast, that we tire of jokes about something happening contemporaneously. I mean, people hadn't finished putting their lawn furniture back in the same place, and we, as a culture, had moved on.
Once-in-a-century earthquake? How five minutes ago. Literally.
I don't want to be too much of a Get Off My Lawn type, but I hope the LP learns to slow down and appreciate the world. Just because the world keeps moving faster and information keeps moving, doesn't mean we can't stop and marvel at things. Once in a century!
How fast will the world be moving when the LP is writing some blog about the Even Littler Poseur in some distant future?*
*Assuming, of course, we are not conquered by robots.
The LP probably won't have a problem with the faster and faster pace of the world. Will I be able to keep up with my child?
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